A week or so back I saw one of my new-mother friends having a really rough time. She was a first time mom, nervous to be alone with new baby (then again aren’t we all?), scared to go anywhere with new baby, but most of all….new baby would not go to sleep. She was living on a couple hours of sleep daily, as her beautiful new baby would not calm down enough to sleep more than a couple hours at a time.
As much as I hurt for her I realized….she is not the only woman out there who wants to pull her hair out with a baby constantly crying, to where it seems like you cannot comfort him/her. I am not writing today about crying babies though (maybe next time)….Today I want to dedicate to my amazing 2 (almost 3 year old) daughter who has just introduced us to her beautiful tantrums!
My 5 year old NEVER had fits to even compare to this angel. I mean, it all started one day over cake pops! Yep…you heard me right. I was making my first batch ever of homemade cake pops and she was mad because she couldn’t have one yet. She let out one heck of a SCREAM….RAN down the hall to her room…SLAMMED her door so hard I was sure it cracked in half and by the time I got in there my mouth just dropped open. She was throwing toys!! Yep….at me…at my husband…across the room….I had never seen anything like it.
Now I have heard some parents philosophies…”If you hit me, I’ll hit you back” or “If you pull my hair, I’ll pull yours” even “You bite me, I’ll bite you back”!! I am not that extreme by any means…I have learned to let her storm, slam, and scream until she calms down (about 5 minutes) then I go in to talk to her. It is a HUGE learning curve for me though; I mean it is out of my comfort zone ya know? I HATE fights and fits and slamming doors and crying kids and screaming….I have just learned to endure 5 minutes to get a complete normal recovery without anyone getting hurt. J
I have learned that when kids throw tantrums it is because they do not know yet how to express their feelings…they feel like screaming and crying is the only way to show others how they feel. Figuring out the right communication techniques will greatly help overcome this though. Kids love to communicate when they know how to. They may be upset but giving them a chance to tell you what they are feeling and what is wrong can help both you understand what they are feeling and them understand the right or wrong in their behavior.