October 21, 2015

Relationship Advice

Relationship Advice: List of Demands

Relationship Advice

Hi, Friends-

Over the past couple of weeks, we have had a theme to our chats, and it has been conscience of our choices and the impact they have on others. I do think it is important to think about others, but it is important to take care of yourself. I am known for being demanding. I used to think that was a bad thing but then if you look at what I demand it is really what everyone should demand of the people around them. I know demand has a negative connotation but in reality it is a standard that you set for yourself and then your expectations of others is either met or exceeded. The dreaded list of my demands:

1) Honesty
2) Communication
3) Support
4) Love
5) Respect
6) Trust

That is it. I know you were expecting a big long list of demands , but the truth is happiness is created in a relationship by doing and giving those six things. They are the cornerstone of any relationship’s success. I believe if you are not giving and receiving those things you need to sit down with your partner and have a conversation. I am very clear in my expectations because love isn’t a guessing game. I can’t expect my husband to meet my needs if I do not tell him what is important. That is one of the reasons I do not do laundry. I just hate it and because I hate it my husband has taken over that job. It is a tangible way that he shows his love. I think as a society we get caught up in chasing the “bling.” We want our partners to buy us things to show that they love us. You need to change that if that is a perception that love is shown through things. I am an “actions speak louder than words girl.” I can frankly buy my things, and I want my husband to recognize my needs or listen and act on the needs I express. It is the little things on Sunday my husband makes breakfast and the kids or my husband brings it to me in bed. I always do payroll, content planning, writing, and work early Sunday morning so I can spend the rest of the day with my family. I need that quiet time to get everything off my plate. It is my husband’s way of letting me know he supports my business and me. If you expect your relationship to be a true partnership, then you also have to be on the giving end not just the receiving one.

I handle everything that my husband doesn’t want to. He is easily overwhelmed by the kid’s schedules. He has trouble following the quick turnaround time between school, homework, dinner, and sports. I handle all of that as well as meal planning, cooking except on the weekends, and grocery shopping. He also can’t balance the demands of his job and the demands of the family. I try to demand very little in those areas unless I am traveling for work since my job is a little more flexible. If there is a change in routine I try to give him as much advance warning as possible and I, try to utilize my friend network prior to asking him to pitch in. It really is overwhelming to him and not necessary if I can avoid it. I believe that being a good partner is to help your partner where they need.

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I did promise you that date night information. I am a huge football fan, so I made a fantastic and low-calorie chicken nacho. I got my husband his favorite apple cider. We turned off all electronic, turned on the fireplace, and watched the game. I did squish myself in his chair after we ate. You are never to old to be cuddled. Life is about creating memories make sure you work on taking the time to make opportunities.

Until next week, you will have to wait for more adventures, guidance, and fun

Amee
Your Truthful Girlfriend

Also read my 4 Tips to Parenting

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RealAdviceGal

Cook, Baker, Phototaker, Fitness Mover and Shaker, Cupcake Tester, Deal Maker, Adventurous Undertaker, Do Good "Deeder", Teacher, Mom, Wife, Patriot for Life & Giver of Good Advice - RealAdviceGal

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