September 24, 2012

Karla’s Korner: Twenty-three Years and Counting

I am proud to introduce a new column to Madame Deals! I think we all need a touch point a place we can go to be inspired. Karla is my children’s teacher, a good friend, and a person with a heart of gold. I hope that her words will inspire you to do more. We are only as good as the people we surround ourselves with. It is important to listen with your heart and proceed with your eyes open. Enjoy!

As I sit down to write this it is Sunday afternoon and by the time I write my next article my husband and I will have celebrated our 23rd wedding anniversary. I took a few minutes to pull out our wedding album and take a trip down memory lane. The pictures bring back fond memories of that special day and as I look at that young farm girl and her handsome Carolina boy I wonder where the time has gone and how in the world we have made it. I have heard so many people tell me over the years that we are lucky to have such a perfect marriage and family. To that I just shake my head and try to explain that our life is far from perfect and that includes our marriage and our family. What I (we) have discovered is that marriage is a job; a tough job that takes a lot of work. Sometimes it takes more work from one than the other; it’s a give and take relationship. For example, this past week was more of a “give” from my husband because he cooked dinner most of the week and well that left the “take” part of it for me; which I did with a happy heart and stomach.

When I met my husband nearly 25 years ago I knew almost instantly that he was the one for me. Our first date (April 16, 1988) was pretty low-key as far as first dates go. He invited me over for dinner and a movie. As I watched him cook, I somehow knew that this man would cook many more dinners for me during my lifetime. As a matter of fact, just five months after that first dinner, he proposed to me while I was standing at the stove cooking his dinner. That night, September 30, 1988 changed our lives forever. We took a year to plan our wedding and our new life together and on September 30, 1989 this farm girl married her Carolina boy took his hand and began a journey that has become the story of “us”. While the story is not spectacular, it is ours. We celebrated the birth of our daughter just four years after we married and as we stared down at her we both realized that we had absolutely no idea how we were going to do the whole parent thing; somehow we managed and today, she is one of the most amazing young women I have ever known. She inspires me to be a better person and shines in her own unique way paving her own path and writing her own life story. Three years later we mourned the loss of our second child and wondered if our hearts could take the pain. We managed to survive and two years later we welcomed our beautiful little boy into our hearts on the exact month/day that our second child was due. This day was particularly special because it was our 7th wedding anniversary; September 30, 1998. Once again we wondered how we would manage with two children and once again we did. That little boy who is now taller than his momma is in high school and paving his way into the world as well. We have been blessed.

Life has somehow flown by and here we are approaching our anniversary once again and once again I am more than thankful for the gift of another year with my husband, David. How’d we do it? Oh, I could say something cheesy and explain that true love prevails; but quite frankly, it’s hard work. When we exchanged our wedding vows all those years ago we made a promise that we would never give up. Giving up is too easy and anything worth having is worth working for. So we have spent the past 23 years working at this thing we call our life. We have disagreed, made up, agreed to disagree, spent many nights caring for sick children, and worried about everything from chicken pox to college tuition. We’ve packed up and moved several times, faced new jobs, made new friends, mourned the loss of a few family members and friends we’ve shared our faith openly with our children and community all the while working toward each new phase of our life together with the promise of never giving up.

Looking back at that young girl from so long ago and the person I was then, I find that I like the me I am now. The road we have travelled to get here has not been smooth and without bumps. Quite often our life road has been paved with rocks, speed bumps and winding curves that we could not see around. It is because of those obstacles that we are where we are and who we are today. And once in a while when I feel troubled or overwhelmed I know that my strength to go on will come from the man who has been my best friend, my love, my past, present and future and the one who has loved  me in spite of myself at times; my husband David. Happy Anniversary dear husband….here’s to many many more. I love you to pieces.



Check out all of Karla’s Korner articles here.

Also, please visit Karla’s Lifetime Moms page and read her articles.

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