Karla’s Korner: Fear Not
Life has a funny way of teaching us lessons. Once in a while I am struck at how the simplest of things leave the deepest impact and teach the most valuable lessons. To live abundantly and to really enjoy life, requires us to pay attention to the small things, the everyday ordinary things that when combined together make up the really big things; the most important elements in our life story. As much as I focus on embracing the ordinary, I still find myself wanting something more, searching for something bigger filled with a deeper meaning that just the ordinary. Quite often what keeps me from something bigger, from taking chances and going beyond the mundane is fear. It is in fact easier for me to write about facing fear and anxieties than putting in the work to overcome it. Knowing what to do and doing it is two completely different matters. It is a work in progress.
Fear is defined as” an unpleasant emotion caused by the belief that someone or something is dangerous, likely to cause pain, or a threat.” All too often we allow this emotion to get in the way of happiness, success and sometimes love. As I reflected this week on the 27th anniversary of my first date with my husband, I remember the fear I had that night. The “what if’s” played over and over in my head causing doubt and of course, fear to settle in. As we spent that evening together enjoying a meal that he cooked, watching a movie and talking the fear subsided a bit and I was able to enjoy it. When he invited me to sit next to him on the sofa so he could show me some cheesy card trick I could have remained in my safe zone, the chair I was sitting in, or I could choose to move next to him on the sofa and set the fear aside. I chose to move; it was a good choice.
How often do we find ourselves fearful of something that could potentially be wonderful? One of our biggest fears is change. The unknown factor in change creates fear. We must realize that not only is change a good thing is it necessary. A dear friend once said “change is good…just ask a butterfly”. He was referring to the physical and spiritual changes I was experiencing and the fears I had in doing so. As exciting as it was to be losing weight, getting fit and becoming more connected to my spiritual self it was also quite daunting. I was leaving behind the lifestyle I had chosen to live for over twenty years. I was leaving behind the food that I loved and used to comfort me and was choosing to fight through the addiction, shame and discover who I really am. Change was breaking out of the cocoon I had built around myself and opening up to the life I was meant to live. “Fear and worry are a wasted emotion” he said, “there’s no more time for that, offer it up to God and get on with living”. And that is my goal every single day.
Fear limits our abilities and holds us back from experiencing our best life. Because fear is merely an emotion, we can choose to stop giving it reality. Fear I believe is necessary to a degree; being fearful or mindful of dangerous situations and/or people is a good thing but allowing fear to consume our every moment can prevent us from living the life we are meant to have. Fear is like an anchor holding a ship at sea in one place. When we allow it to take the lead in our lives we lose sight of hopes and dreams and merely hold on to exist; life is not about existing but living. Holding on to fear prohibits us from being able to reach out and grasp what my friend Carole calls “the good stuff”. When we hold onto fear (and other wasted emotions) we have no room for anything else and become a prisoner in our own lives.
What is it that causes you to be fearful? What is it that gets in the way of living your best life? Identifying our fears is the first step in conquering them. When we incorporate positive emotions like love, joy, kindness, happiness and sincerity into our lives we eliminate space for negativity and fear. This week I encourage you to identify your fears, name them, write them down on a piece of paper and then get rid of them; I place my fears in my prayer box. Time spent in fear is time wasted. To sum it all up by an unknown author “Fear is nothing more than an obstacle that stands in the way of progress. In overcoming our fears we can move forward stronger and wiser within ourselves.” Fear not….
I think we all need a touch point a place we can go to be inspired. Karla is my children’s teacher, a good friend, and a person with a heart of gold. I hope that her words will inspire you to do more. We are only as good as the people we surround ourselves with. It is important to listen with your heart and proceed with your eyes open. Enjoy!
Read more Karla’s Korner, also please visit Karla’s Lifetime Moms page and read her articles.
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