Karla’s Korner: Dealing with Bad Days
You Had a Bad Day
Every once in a while I find myself staring at a blank screen on a late Sunday afternoon wondering what it is I have to say and share with my readers this week. Every once in a while I find myself at a complete loss for words or motivation. Every once in a while I just want to say screw it and give up, because well, life ain’t easy. Bad days, even bad weeks come around every now and then. Acknowledging that it’s supposed to be that way, tough days even weeks or longer happen but the key I think is in how we handle it. Certified life coach and cancer survivor Berta Lippert wrote, “Don’t forget that you’re human. It’s okay to have a meltdown, just don’t unpack and live there. Cry it out and then refocus on where you’re headed.” How often is it that we find ourselves sitting on the pity pot feeling sorry for our situation asking “why me?” or filling ourselves up with anger because things didn’t go as planned.
In sharing a difficult situation with a dear friend this week she shared with me that it really is okay to have a crappy day and to admit it. Quite often women, especially find it necessary to be the fixer, be the one who takes care of everything for everyone else. We try so hard to make sure that bad days don’t happen for our families, friends, co-workers, etc., that we forget to take care of ourselves and seem to be blindsided when the tough stuff rolls around; it’s going to happen. And according to Lippert, it is how we respond to those bad days that is important.
Realizing that having a bad day or two is inevitable I find it necessary to figure out how to positively embrace such days. No one wants to experience a bad day, a tough time, a struggle or a problem. That’s the not so fun part of life and as much as we would like to live a problem free life we must acknowledge that we can’t do that; it’s just not possible. A bad day can be a positive element of your life if you allow it to be; life lessons can be learned from a bad day. Admitting that you are having a bad day does not mean you have to allow the bad day to continue. We can choose to react to those bad days in one of three ways. We can relish or sulk about it allowing ourselves to unpack and stay in the situation, we can admit it which will encourage support from those around us or we can ignore it and hope it just goes away.
With each option comes a different outcome. Naturally sulking about something will get you nowhere; it is not a positive reaction. It is okay, I think to be unhappy about a situation but to sulk and sit on the proverbial pity pot is not a healthy reaction. Admitting our issues to others will allow them to share in the toughness of the situation. After all isn’t it better to have support from others rather than keeping it all to ourselves. Having a strong life support system through family and friends is a necessary element to a happy productive life. Ignoring the situation can be tricky and also beneficial to a degree. Not giving the situation life by acknowledging or sulking about it rather ignoring it, refusing to give whatever it is “life” and choosing to power through it.
Whatever it is that causes you distress or brings about a not so pleasant day I encourage you to take time to determine the most positive effective way to handle it. Sometimes I think that it’s necessary to acknowledge it just so you are not alone but making every effort not to stay in the funk of the day, choosing to learn a lesson and move forward in a positive manner. Whatever the situation I encourage you to remain positive, productive and give yourself permission to know it’s okay to have a bad day and admit it. For me, I recognize that there will be more bad days ahead and some of those days I will choose to sulk because I am human and I make mistakes. There will be others where I admit it, seeking help, support and encouragement from my tribe, the weirdos who love me for me and once in a while I will choose to put my big girl pants on and ignore the muck pushing through to better brighter days. It’s your life, it’s your days live them to the fullest and know it’s okay to admit that not all your days will be great.
I think we all need a touch point a place we can go to be inspired. Karla is my children’s teacher, a good friend, and a person with a heart of gold. I hope that her words will inspire you to do more. We are only as good as the people we surround ourselves with. It is important to listen with your heart and proceed with your eyes open. Enjoy!
Check out Karla’s 24 Day Advocare Challenge!