Karla’s Korner: A Letter to My Heart
A Letter to My Heart…….
American author Elizabeth Stone wrote “Making the decision to have a child – it is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ” The longer I parent the more this rings true. I thought that somehow this whole parenting thing would become easier as time went on and the children grew up; it does not.
Looking back on the many years I’ve had a momma’s heart I realize that it never gets easier; it changes but never gets easier. Nobody ever told me that the tiny little person who used to take up residence in my arms would break my heart, keep me awake, interrupt my sleep and require me to be on guard every minute of the day. Looking back I don’t recall anyone telling me just how complicated having a momma’s heart would be. There’s no book and no fancy speech that can prepare our heart for the many stages of parenthood. It is my wish to shed a bit of my own life experiences as I write a letter to my heart:
When I became a parent I was not quite sure you could handle the amount of love that consumed every fiber of my being for that tiny pink little person. From the first moment our eyes met I knew that nothing would ever be the same. In those early days when sleep was sporadic, food was always eaten cold and standing up and yet somehow you never wavered. As a matter of fact, your love grew bigger. She made you bigger, stronger and better. When life dealt the devastating blow of letting our angel baby go to Heaven you broke a little because well, it hurt and you ached for what could have been; love kept you going. But life had a way of making it better and we were given another chance at love; our boy came along and turned our world upside down. Going through those early years were filled with lots of ups, downs and in betweens. Each age and stage seemed to push and pull at your strings a bit but yet you managed to hold more, love more and remain steadfast.
But dear heart of mine, the most challenging parts were yet to come because you see those sweet little pink babies have grown and are now planning to take on the next stage of their lives. What now? What are we supposed to do? Nobody told us that it would be like this. Nobody told us that one day there would be an empty bedroom with nothing left but a few unwanted odds and ends; or did they? Maybe we just didn’t want to think about that part of parenting. You know the part where those little people morph into big people taking those life lessons we so willingly taught them and move on. Maybe we just ignored all of the signs because wandering around in an empty house was not something we wanted to think about. Maybe, we simply let life pass us by so quickly that we didn’t even think about it; until now.
But heart strings are strong. With each and every moment of our lives, whether with our children, spouses, life partners, friends and extended family those heart strings are stretched to the max; they don’t break. And as we face this new chapter in our lives together we must remain strong, focused and acknowledge that while the family dynamic is changing, our heart strings will remain intact. With each new step of our life journey we will acknowledge the grief involved with change and uncertainty; but with that acknowledgment comes a renewed commitment that the bond between our hearts has not weakened with time rather strengthened. So as the big people who have taken the place of those sweet tiny tots begin to spread their wings and ready themselves for flight into the world know that you will survive and you will become stronger; because heart strings don’t break. Stay strong. Be brave. Love with all that you have plus a little more stretching yourself because well, heart strings don’t break.
I think we all need a touch point a place we can go to be inspired. Karla is my children’s teacher, a good friend, and a person with a heart of gold. I hope that her words will inspire you to do more. We are only as good as the people we surround ourselves with. It is important to listen with your heart and proceed with your eyes open. Enjoy!
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