I was in my bathroom yesterday. It isn’t a large space, in fact, it is a single sink adjacent to a wall with a bathtub. It is a readily available contestant for one of those renovation shows. It is tight space with barely enough room to turn around with warmed well loved yellow walls that I painted while six months pregnant on one of those nesting adventures. It has areas of despair and happiness where my kids have added stickers or little notes hidden from view but I know where they are and I leave them because they make me smile.
This little space is where I connect best with my daughter. It is my classroom.
She is only eight, but she has spent almost every morning of her entire life crammed into that space. It started when she was in her car seat watching me take a bath until now. She does her best to stay out of my way, but she usually ends up right where I need to be. She is watching what I am doing. What I apply to my face. What makeup I put on or do not put on. She admires my necklaces and has begun to suggest some.
When I leave the sink to get my clothes because usually, I am in my robe something funny happens a magic trick of sorts.
She picks up one of my Dove soap and washes her face. She pats it dry just like I do. Then with a single stroke, she paints blush on her cheek or pulls a brush through her long tangled hair. She becomes me. She transforms right in front of my eyes from a little girl into women. When I understood, she was looking at me for her self-image. I began to use less make-up.
I understood that putting on all that make-up taught my daughter that to be pretty I needed to hide my imperfections.
I took off my mask so my daughter would learn she didn’t need to wear one.
You see make-up doesn’t make you confident it comes from the inside. I watch my daughter always impressed by the way she moves in and out of the world. She is happy, kind, and self-confident. I told my husband how amazed I was by her and he laughed. He said, “You know she is just like you.”
I looked at him, and it dawned on me. We truly are a lot alike. Then I began to wonder did I get my self-esteem from what my mother said or did. I asked my mom a couple of questions about how I became someone who embraces her imperfections. I know that I am a leader and I do not let other people diminish who I am and I take care of myself but I do not spend a tremendous amount of time of painting my face.
This is what she said,
“How did you instill body positivity in me growing up?
As you were a fashionista in your teens, I always complimented you on how you looked but sometimes teased you so you would not take things so seriously.
How did you inspire me to reach my personal well-being goals?
By discussing setting and attaining goals and the importance of doing your best as everyone has different talents.
How did you help me find my inner beauty?
By telling you how good a person you were and to love yourself for who you are and accept others for who they are.
What’s the most important piece of advice you have for me while instilling these values with my daughter?
Love her unconditionally and build her confidence to never limit herself.“
After reading my mom’s responses, I think more than telling me those things she showed me those things. You know my mom is a hard worker, and she never let being a woman stop her from doing anything. She had a dream and desires to do more. She takes an idea and runs it. I find her drive and passion to be beautiful. I see myself in her. I know I still have great style because she always finds a way to shop in my closet when she visits.
Then it was time to see how I was doing with my daughter.
This is my little girl, Dove user, and confident leader.
Note: The interview was taped by my son who held the camera and couldn’t stop laughing at her responses. You can tell Dove has a true fan in my daughter. She does take showers in my bathroom because of my Dove products, and after listening to her message, you will know why!
After we made this video, we had a chat about being confident. I shared with her that confidence isn’t arrogance and if you do not believe in yourself who will believe in you?
I hope as a mom to a daughter and a mom to sons that I teach them to listen to what they know about themselves.
If only I could hand them ear plugs when the world shouts you aren’t good enough. I can’t, but I can build a shield from the inside out. I can give them the message and the mantras to repeat to overcome the negativity.
I can give them their fight song for their shield, love, and empowerment by sharing the tools I have used. The only goal I have for myself is to improve on who I am daily. That comes from working hard, being kind to others, and being willing to learn.
Stock up on Dove products they are available at Walmart. The best part is they are so affordable you can share. My Dove skin care products make my morning and evening rituals one of the best parts of my day.
Visit Dove Hub at Walmart to learn more about Dove’s 60 years and Dove products.