What to wear to the pool? I have explored that reality before in another post. The question I now have is what to wear to exercise at the pool? I pictured the ladies in the fancy swimming caps with the flowers and the matching bathing suits frolicking about. I envisioned my first pool based fitness class to resemble the commercial with the synchronized swimming and amazing array of aerial images flashing across the television. I imagined my jiggling parts didn’t jiggle and all of my lady parts were firmly pressed against me as I moved to the beat on the radio.
I had trouble envisioning the collection of tangled bathing suits in my drawer living up to my fantasy. I began to mentally imagine the implications of wearing the mommy bathing suit. It was dubbed this title because I wore it on my way to becoming a mommy and on my way to becoming my “normal” size after giving birth. The suit has enough fabric to make caps for everyone in the class.
I then further mentally untangled the suits to reveal the bikini I have. I imaged all sorts of things floating to the surface as the exercisers in the pool frantically pound the water. I also imagined the bathing suit riding up in places that no cowboy had gone before. The other issue is this is the suit that contains the miracle that makes my boobs look like my favorite bra. This is wonderful but I am not sure how the illusion will hold up with intense exercise. This is the “see the results kinda of suit” not feel the burn.
The next suit in my heap of suits is the two piece bathing suit with the bottoms that are two large. These require the same intensity in execution that my falling underpants did. I can wear this suit but I have to walk with a larger stance and crouch to keep my drawers where they belong.
The final suit that I had at my disposal is my string bikini. I call this my inspiration suit. I bought it to inspire me to get to the gym. I of course bought this suit thinking I was sixteen and not 30 something. I also failed to remember that I have children. This suit is design for a target audience that is different from mine. I can no longer depend on two knots on the top and two knots on the bottoms to keep my private parts private. I mean I have a two year old who would gladly pull on the bow. This is also not the suit for water aerobics it was designed for people who lay by the pool not those that work out in the pool. I actually never thought about how much luck you have to have to keep that suit on. If one string fails to stay tied you could be arrested for public nudity. This my friends is a suit for a woman who likes excitement.
The decision was made I needed an exercise suit. I decided to get bottoms for the two piece bathing suit because it was the easiest and most financially solvent decision to make. I then made the mistake of explaining the concept of needing a bathing suit to exercise in to my husband. I asked my husband where he thought I should go to find an exercise bathing suit? He of course made reference to my drawer. I was going to start explaining the suits I had and the limitations of the fabric and their coverage deficits when he said “You will be fine so just wear a suit you have and limit your motions” I kept thinking this is an exercise class not a mannequin class.