Broken Heart

good deed make us grow

If it often said that the heart is the muscle that can be hurt the deepest. It is also the most resilient. I find Facebook to be a place of both deep sadness and overwhelming happiness. I mean Facebook killed a friendship of mine.  You see one of the things bloggers do not talk about often is how we get our work done. Blogging is a very difficult job and you often feel as if you are on your own island. You believe you get it and the whole system changes overnight because of some update by someone who hasn’t any interest in your business. You have incredibles highs and lows. It is because of that waive of uncertainty that the blogging professionals  join facebook groups for support. We need daily quotes of inspiration and the interaction that our friends online bring us. We need it because blogging can be lonely and difficult. You never know if your post will reach the person for whom it is intended. You never know they reaction it will receive and you never are quite sure if tomorrow you will resonant with your current audience.

We are online anyway so it makes sense that we have found one another on Facebook. It is our way of networking, learning, and being part of a community. The problem is some bloggers behave badly. It is the law of averages. There are going to be so many bad eggs per good eggs produced. The issue is these bad eggs have an audience. The audience members also have a large audience and unfortunately people rarely check facts or consider what piping in on someones rant may cause.

I have been the subject of some of these rants and it always amazes me that people do not consider the source. The source is usually someone who is known for causing trouble. The source is usually someone who doesn’t have the guts to actually confront the person they wish to “talk about”. They instead post a tirade and wait for people to back up their claims and to my astonishment people do. They jump right in there and begin to tear someone else down. I wonder does it make them feel better to be nasty, cruel, and hurtful? I know when I say something that is hurtful I immediately want to take it back. That isn’t what happens in these groups and the poor choices continue and they often grow ugly and cruel. The whole purpose of the group is to support one another and that isn’t always the case.

Then later on you see in your newsfeed the ramifications of these “professionals” attacks when the person who was attacked posts how upset they are. I am so thankful for these posts  since the person is able to receive validation that they are in fact not horrible. I am thankful that people take the time to show kindness and gratitude. I am thankful that people take a moment from their job and their life to remind others about their importance because you never know how much words can hurt. You never know what reaction can be caused. The groups you are in on facebook are not private. They are not secret and they are not meant to create and fester hate and they are there to help one another. I would actually ask all admins of Facebook groups to remove people who take their nasty comments and actions public because of the liability involved but really because it just doesn’t belong. It isn’t okay to organize groups and people to be nasty. I am asking you to take ownership if you see this happening to someone and contact the admin of the group. I believe that we all need to be more helpful to others. You also have the power to say in a public way what your doing isn’t nice and you need to stop it. I think we all get scared of bullies and instead if we all banned together to redirect them or remove them it would be a better for everyone. Today is pay it forward Friday and I am going to ask you listen with your heart.

I would also like to ask you to find one of these good deeds out of the 100 things you can do to help others for free and do that because you just never know how much your actions can impact someone else. Lets make today about lifting someone else up with kindness because really part of being influential is using your influence to do something positive for someone else.



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  1. says

    As a blogger for going on 4 years, I haven’t felt lonely one bit! I belong to blogger forums and have cultivated close relationships with other bloggers that I have both met physically and many that I have yet to meet in ‘real life’. I also follow a few inspirational bloggers, I know they ‘get’ it too.

    But if you are getting ‘haters’ or those anonymous, mean comments, that’s social media’s version of bullying, hate-mongers and gossip-mongers. I have those in my money-earning job. If you do something publicly, this is, sadly, norm!! I have unfriended and removed people in my social media world just as I have removed and ended friendships that did not involve social media. I don’t think this is unusual or uncommon. It’s sad, but it is human nature and not the cause of work, blogging, social media or anything else. I wish it didn’t happen. However, the only person I have control over when such situations arise in my life is myself. I get to choose my own outcome and that’s something no one can take away. Be strong and brave; when the audience is bigger, there are more people to be either supportive or not supportive for you. Think of how it is for our President!!!

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